Steelers Fan Gets to Turn on Lights at ‘A Christmas Story’ House
The A Christmas Story house and museum held a contest, affectionately named The Griswold Contest, that awarded one lucky fan the opportunity to plug in a truly spectacular light display. Yep, a Steelers fan won. Oh Fudge indeed. Bob Cox even wore his No. 86 Hines Ward jersey while performing the honor. Picture below. Check…
Police Called to McDonald’s After Fight Over Fries
“Just give me the fries, and everybody goes home to their families.” This is a great Christmas story (we’re still on the holiday tip) because despite being straight from the more ridiculous annuls of the police blotter, it’s anchored in some gosh darn messy love between a man and his missus. French fries are the…
Stephen Hoffman, President of the Jewish Community Federation of Cleveland, Makes Lots and Lots of Money
A Jewish newspaper recently posted a list of the 2009 salaries of heads of 74 Jewish federations and other institutions across the country. Their findings: None of them are suffering, but one local boss is faring particularly well. Stephen Hoffman, president of the Jewish Community Federation of Cleveland, topped the list of all 19 federation…
Ed Fitzgerald’s Plan for Law Department Could Weaken Bill Mason
Earlier this month, County Executive-elect Ed FitzGerald unveiled his plans for the county’s looming makeover. Already it appears Cuyahoga 2.0 will come equipped with its own turf war. FitzGerald’s vision calls for a new director of law to handle the county’s legal business. Under our old-fashioned government, that role fell to the General Civil Division…
Stacy Galavan, Lorain Mom, Feeds Kids Booze Till They’re Sick
Bad, bad mom. Want to read an honest-to-God gooey-feeling Christmas story, the reformed Grinch, Rudolph steering the herd, Chuck Brown and the runt tree, something along those lines? Don’t read this one. Reader beware. 32-year-old Lorain mother of two Stacy Galavan let her kids get into the liquor cabinet. And she let them keep drinking.…
Fewer Road Accidents Over Christmas This Year
Getting a little better each year, hopefully. Congrats Ohio, you’ve improved! According to the stats just beamed out from the Ohio Department of Public Safety, the Christmas holiday claimed less lives in road and alcohol related accidents this year. Six people were killed, with two deaths attributed to the bottle. Last year saw 11 deaths,…
Shooting at Wickliffe Teen Nightclub
This teen is a computer generated image, so she’s safe. Ah, the teen nightclub — there’s no other American institution like it. It’s kind of like a full-blown nightclub on training wheels, or an unchaperoned high school dance left to culminate in it’s own logical conclusion: newly discovered libidos getting their full workout under the…
Yuengling May Soon Come to Ohio
Affordable, delicious, unavailable in this state. If you count displaced East Coasters as friends, you’ve probably heard all about Yuengling beer, as in, “Wat the hack’s wrong with youse guys, you can’t gat a Yuengling inz this state.” The Pennsylvania beer — best known for its small town home-base and bragging rights as the country’s…
Another Criminal Caught Because of Footprints in the Snow
This little girl is definitely going to get caught. We chronicle dumb criminals on this blog not just for the enjoyment of you the reader, but also as a public service to would-be criminals out there. These, folks, are mistakes not be repeated. Obviously someone didn’t read our previous installments on thieves caught by cops…
Top Ten Most-Read Stories of 2010
2010 will be done and over come this weekend, and what a year it was. LeBron left, the Cuyahoga County Corruption All Stars went down, voters opted to enter 2011 with a new form of government, the Browns had another quarterback controversy, the Indians found new and exciting ways to be irrelevant, and Cleveland was…
James Franco’s Grandma Thinks You’re a Bunch of Pussies
James Franco’s grandmother, Mitzi Levine Verne, is a pretty prominent Clevelander, if you didn’t know. She owns the Verne Art Gallery and, as a rule, is generally cool, as you can see for yourself in the video below, which was taken as Grandma Verne was in California to visit her uber-famous grandson for Christmas. Yeah,…
Merry Christmas, You Scumbags
This blog will be shut down for the holidays starting right this very minute. Let there be joy and mirth and booze and food and loved ones for all of you. At the very least, booze. Here’s “Fairytale of New York” by the Pogues, the best Christmas song ever, to get you in the spirit.…
Indians Losing Money on Snow Days
The New York Times posted an article about the Tribe’s Snow Days festivities and here’s just about the only interesting thing to take away from the piece: Encouraging that habit would seem particularly important for the Indians, who drew fewer fans — 1,391,644 — than any other major league club this season. Although the Indians…
Woman Claims Nut Shows Image of Jesus
Tis the season… to see images of Jesus on completely random pieces of food. Last week we had the Ohio man who claims there’s an image of Jesus and Mary on a piece of candy. This week it’s an Ohio woman who claims there’s an image of Jesus on a pistachio nut. Yep, a pistachio…
Ray Lewis Is Not Impressed With Peyton Hillis
Peyton Hillis rushed for 144 yards during the Browns’ first meeting with the Baltimore Ravens this year. Hillis ranks 10th in the league in total rush yards (1129), is tied for 3rd in rushing touchdowns (11), and, oh yeah, ranks 1st in Awesomeness, Cool Facemasks, and Bodies Run Through. That does not impress Baltimore Ravens…
Less Sewage to Flow Into Lake Erie
File under: Holy shit, how much sewage has been flowing into Lake Erie and why are we just fixing this now? It’s 2010, right? Not 1960? The AP reports that the government has brokered a deal with the Northeast Ohio Regional Sewer District that will make NEORSD stop dumping so much unfiltered sewage into our…
Morning Brew: Lakewood Further Solidifies LGBT Rights, Casino News, Problems at Ohio State, and Eugene Sanders’ Replacement
Good morning(ish), Cleveland. Here’s some stuff to read while you find something else to do with the time you had penciled in to watch Ohio State play in the Sugar Bowl. — Looks like suspensions could be coming for Ohio State as the Buckeyes get ready for the Sugar Bowl against Alabama. Multiple reports allege…
Absolutely Epic 1974 Letter From Cleveland Browns to a Fan
In November of 1974, a Browns fan and season ticket holder sent a letter to the team regarding a concern of his. The Cleveland Browns (specifically, their general counsel) sent back an absolutely epic response. Here are their two letters (click on images to enlarge): If that’s not clear, here’s the transcribed text: Gentlemen: I…
Absolutely Epic 1974 Letter From Cleveland Browns to a Fan
In November of 1974, a Browns fan and season ticket holder sent a letter to the team regarding a concern of his. The Cleveland Browns (specifically, their general counsel) sent back an absolutely epic response. Here are their two letters (click on images to enlarge): If that’s not clear, here’s the transcribed text: Gentlemen: I…
Xbox Shot in Cleveland
We greatly enjoyed this lede from a NewsNet5 story this morning: CLEVELAND – A 20-year-old man and an Xbox were shot as gunfire and snowballs were exchange on a Cleveland street. It’s not all fun and games, however; the victim is in critical condition at a local hospital. No word on the condition of the…
Cleveland’s 2010 Summed Up In One Video
We somehow missed this video the first time around, but after stumbling upon it yesterday, we’re pretty sure there’s no better few minutes that perfectly encapsulate what 2010 has meant to Cleveland. To set the scene: The clip is from a patented Carl Monday investigation. Cleveland’s favorite private-eye stalks Public Employee 39 (one Miss Gina…
Take Shelter, Jeff Nichols’ Movie Filmed in Ohio, Drawing National Interest
We’re not the only ones excited to see Take Shelter, the new movie from director Jeff Nichols that was shot entirely in Northeast Ohio. First crack goes to attendees of the Sundance Film Festival, where Take Shelter will debut next month. Already, Vanity Fair calls it “our personal vote for most anticipated film” of the…
The Next Step for Treasurer Jim Rokakis
He’ll lose the Treasurer title, but not the ‘stache. The arrival of the new county government will scatter pieces of the old one all over Northeast Ohio, but at least one former star may land on a larger stage. Treasurer Jim Rokakis is in conversation with Cleveland State University’s Maxine Goodman Levin College of Urban…
Man Gets 36th Ticket for Driving Without a License
Oh, Lorain. Our search for entertaining news would be so much less fruitful without you every week. We’ll make sure to get you something nice for Christmas to show our thanks for the bounty of misfits and idiotic criminals that call your fine city home. Misfits like Isidro Casarez. Casarez, 49, was pulled over Saturday…
Concert Calendar, Just For You
BOYS FROM THE COUNTY HELL The Pogues tribute band Boys From the County Hell has been around for more than ten years, and they’re something of a local legend these days. They’ve actually toured as a backing band for Spider Stacy, one of the founding members of the Pogues. Almost as impressive: The Cleveland-based eight-piece…
On View This Week
A master is born At 92, Danny Solomon prepares his first art show Danny Solomon was showing promise: He had enjoyed painting floral still lifes and animal portraits, and so for his birthday he got his first real paint set. The thing is, that was his 70th birthday, and it was 22 years ago. Now,…
CD Review: Hate Dies Hard
“I see changes in your eyes,” sneers Sean Barringer on “Blind,” the opening song on Hate Dies Hard’s four-song EP. The Kent rockers’ moniker may peg them as a hardcore band, but the lacerating guitars and chanting vocals have more in common with Tool than, say, As I Lay Dying. Barringer sounds especially powerful on…
Cleveland Atheists
The buzz broke just before Thanksgiving: The nation’s largest atheist organizations would be recruiting for the holidays this year. Most notably, the Freedom From Religion Foundation, the most visible of American atheist groups, planned a nationwide billboard and bus ad campaign featuring catchy quips like “Beware of Dogma,” and “Imagine No Religion.” It’s their gesture…
Last Call 2010: Dinner, Drinks & Drag Queens
Here are some of Northeast Ohio’s best bets:Funny Stuff Aries Spears (The Cleveland Improv Comedy Club & Restaurant) A principal cast member on Fox’s Mad TV, Spears excels in parody, impersonations, and edgy humor. Shows at 7:30 p.m. ($30) and 10:30 p.m. ($55); 21 and over. Dinner packages available. For info, visit clevelandimprov.com. The Improv…
Another Pretty Place
Diners who hoped that the Burntwood Tavern would help remedy the fine-dining deficiency dogging Chagrin Falls are likely to be disappointed. On the other hand, residents hungry for yet another cozy neighborhood saloon can declare themselves winners. When it comes to sheer style, it’s tough to top Burntwood. This ruggedly handsome tavern has the lived-in…
Last Call 2010: The Art of Craft Beer
Cleveland’s love affair with beer dates back at least to 1852 and Charles Gehring, the pioneer brewmaster who created the first locally made lager. By 1910, the city had 26 breweries slaking our thirst with everything from Black Label to P.O.C. Today, those brands of yore have been replaced by a new business model: the…
Bites: Gourmet Burger Spot Opening in Hudson
It’s been only about 10 weeks since Shawn and Tiffany Monday parted the doors of their Hudson bistro, One Red Door. But in just another week, the duo will open Flip Side, a gourmet burger bar located immediately next door. Slated to open December 29, Flip Side will specialize in gourmet burgers constructed from all-natural,…
Last Call 2010: Super Sipping
Here’s a toast to the end of the year, the start of the weekend, the perfect date, and every festive moment in between. Whatever you’re celebrating, be sure to pick the perfect ceremonial beverage. From martinis and margaritas to highballs and absinthe, Cleveland’s bars and bistros offer plenty of signature spirits to help you crystallize…
A NEW QUEER CLASSIC
Jim Carrey plays real-life con man/gay sexual outlaw Steven Russell, whose reckless, irrational determination to live a fairy-tale existence with prison squeeze Phillip Morris (Ewan McGregor) gets both men into a heap of trouble. In their tag-team directorial debut, Glenn Ficarra and John Requa somehow manage to finesse dicey material that might have been virtually…
Get Out!
THURSDAY, DECEMBER 23 Funny Stuff Mike Polk at the Improv Comedian and YouTube sensation Mike Polk wooed us with his Last Call Cleveland comedy troupe. He stole our hearts with his painfully hilarious Hastily Made Cleveland Tourism Video. Then he cemented our affections with last summer’s ditty, “LeBron James Is a Bitch.” Now the Kent…
Stammer Time
There’s something about the real-life British monarchy that makes for great onscreen drama. Scheming princes, lovestruck queens, and ineffectual kings have managed to generate dramatic fireworks with their occasionally mundane, often stuffy subjects. The King’s Speech, the latest movie in this long line of captivating stories rendered from seemingly blah subjects, revolves around a royal…
Back in the Saddle
John Wayne won only one Academy Award. It was for 1969’s True Grit, and it was one of those we-better-honor-the-guy-now-before-he-dies Oscars the Academy hands out every once in a while to aging actors. He was in his early sixties at the time, but he had just beaten cancer and looked older. That made him an…
Focking Miserable
Dustin Hoffman initially refused to appear in Little Fockers, the third — and, if there’s a God, last — in the illustrious comedy series that began a decade ago with Meet the Parents and continued with 2004’s Meet the Fockers. Hoffman eventually agreed to shoot a few scenes, but consider yourself warned about this depressing…
We Get Mail
So Much for World-Class Service The article about Cleveland Clinic’s plans to close the Huron Level II trauma center was very disturbing [“Sorry, We’re Closed,” December 1, 2010]. Since the Clinic tried “to keep secret a decision that potentially affects all Clevelanders” and did not discuss it with first responders, this shows that other issues…
Take a Lunch Break
Now in its third year, Blue Lunch’s (bluelunch.com) annual Matzoh Ball & Latke Party — which comes to the Beachland Ballrooom at 8 p.m. Saturday — has become a yuletide treasure. “Being Jewish, we didn’t have anything to do on Christmas,” says singer-guitarist Bob Frank. “I wanted to do something for Hanukkah, so we put…
On Stage This Week
Black Nativity A soulful retelling of the Gospel of St. Luke from an African-American perspective. Through December 30 at Karamu House, 2355 East 89th St., Cleveland. Tickets are $25 to $30; call 216-795-7077 or go to karamuhouse.org. A Christmas Carol Great Lakes Theater Festival’s 22nd annual production of this Dickens-based classic is presented as a…
Keeper of the Secrets
In the chic murk of the Fairmount Martini and Wine Bar, Tommy Mullady is something of a pub-room holy man. At 48, he’s a slender guy with spiky short hair and a pair of thick-framed glasses sliding down his nose. On any given evening, you’ll probably find him camped out behind the counter of the…
Cash on Delivery
Nothing has a more polarizing effect on music fans than the concept of “selling out.” In fact, try talking about it this week at one of your holiday parties and see how contentious the conversation gets. Start by rattling off some of music’s biggest names. We bet they didn’t get there without some level of gratuitous commercial exposure…
And It Will Stop
Hip-hop needs some major fixing. Even if a few classic albums and songs managed to find audiences this past year, it’s hard to gloss over the fact that a lot of rap music sucks these days. Apparently fans agree. Big Boi made a respected album that, even adjusted for industry deflation, didn’t exactly sell like…
Stay In!
TOP PICK — VIDEO GAME Disney Epic Mickey (Disney) Disney’s best-ever game stars everyone’s favorite pants-wearing mouse in an adventure that’s as fun to play as it is to get lost in. The visual dynamic here is breathtaking — long-lost characters from the Disney archives pop up throughout the story. And the Wii is the…
